Thursday, August 4, 2011
Help!! I Hate Eating!
Recently I have seen lots of posts on a board that I read that go along these lines:
I am about 10 weeks out from surgery. Weight loss is good - I hit the 50lb mark today....yay me! But...and it's a big 'but'...I am totally struggling with food. I just do not want to eat; it's almost like I've developed an aversion to food. Nothing tastes right and after a few bites, I just stop eating. I'm getting in 2 protein shakes a day but even those are a challenge because after drinking about 1/2 of it, I feel like I'm done. I'm not in pain, no discomfort; just no desire to eat. I feel full all the time. I don't have any cravings, even for the 'junk' I used to eat. Last night, my husband made steak on the BBQ. It smelled heavenly and looked great. The first 2 bites were wonderful; after that, I wanted to push it away. I forced myself to eat about 1 1/2 oz. of it and I was done. I'm wondering if this is normal? The irony is I used to pray for the day I wouldn't want to eat. Now it's here and I'm worried. Has this happened to anyone?
This was my response:
To me this was the whole BEAUTY of surgery. You are changing your whole relationship with food and are no longer living to eat but rather you are now eating to live.
Food is no longer your enemy. It no longer controls you or defines your life.
I felt this was the most powerful and amazing thing about surgery. Embrace it!!! Relish in it. Eat for nutrition. Say no to cakes and goodies that you are offered. You have the most amazing power right now.
Her response was:
OMG...what a lightbulb moment! I had never thought about it in that way. Here I am worried that I don't want to eat, when that was the point of this whole process. I've spent so many years thinking about what I'm going to eat next and I am now - finally - at a point where it doesn't matter to me. I wasn't seeing it as powerful but I'm going to try to now. Thank you.
Gosh, the way surgery initially changes your life is amazing. For three weeks, I had to do full fluids (liquids) and surprisingly for the first time in my life, it didn't kill me to do something as tough as that. It literally was my job to take in nutrition every day and work towards my protein and water goals and it was amazing that I did not get hung up on food.
I was probably different than most - I continued to cook full meals for hubby at the time and it didn't bother me.
I became obsessed with "food porn" as I called it and began to just love watching food on the Food Network and it didn't bother me at all. I convinced myself that I could just enjoy and relish in the look of food. It was such a bizarre experience! I remember watching the sugar sculpture food awards where they created these sculptures out of sugar and it didn't bother me a bit. Watching desserts but not eating them was my new past time! LOL!
I always say when you go through this stage, let your power guide you. Say NO to stuff that you don't need nutritionally. If it is "gee I don't care whether I have that or not" -- damnit, say NO and mean NO and take pride in the fact that food no longer controls your decision making!
Eat for health. Eat for nutrition. Eat what your body needs, not what your head needs.
Think of yourself as being SUPERWOMAN or SUPERMAN and enjoy this new super power of yours :) To be in control over food is a WONDERFUL THING!!!!